Westcoastrunner

Once upon a time…

{not fitness related so feel free to pass over}

Once upon I time I owned this house.  I bought it with my ex and kept it (foolishly) after the divorce.  I kept it for all the right reasons…

  • for continuity and consistency for my kiddo
  • to keep her in the same school
  • to keep her with her friends
  • to help her feel secure while her world (and mine) were crumbling around us

But I really shouldn’t have kept it.  No….wait, I should’ve kept it and sold it when the market was still good…before our economy went in the take…before the mortgage was more than I could handle on my own.  But hindsight is, as they say, 20/20.  My crystal ball didn’t tell me that our housing markets were going to dive bomb and that I would ultimately be a victim of the economic crisis….

About 4 years ago I knew that the house was too much for me.  I was working side jobs, selling crap on Ebay and Craigslist and doing ANYTHING possible to make the mortgage.  I tried to get the bank to work with me.  That was futile…they told me that I had to go in the rears (behind) on my mortgage payments before they would consider me for any special programs.  I thought the rationale asinine that I actually had to STOP paying in order to get help.  I mean seriously, why would they want you to do that?!?!  I had lived in this house for 9 years and NEVER had a late or missed payment.  You would think that there would be something to be said for that and that they would want to bend over backwards to help me! 

Nope, instead they bent me over and screwed me!

I went behind on my payments…just like they told me to…then I applied for loan modifications and assistance…they continually denied me, dicked with me and made me jump through a myriad of unending hoops. 

Then, at the end of 2009 they sent me a certified letter to tell me that my house would be going on the foreclosure market.  If it didn’t sell in foreclosure then it would revert back to the bank and I would have approximately 10 days to secure new housing and move out.

Well, the date kept getting moved out and I continued to try to work with the bank. In the mean time I hired a realtor who specialized in listing houses like mine.  We got it listed, priced it to sell and started showing it. 

I started seeing traffic for viewings and after a few slight price adjustments I started getting offers.  We would put them in front of the bank and the bank would DENY them!  Seriously?!?!  This perplexed the HELL out of me….if they foreclosed on me they get nothing…if I see it, even short sell it, they at least get SOMETHING!

Well, with 1 active offer and 2 back up offers on the table I got the notification that my house was going up for foreclosure auction on the Friday of Memorial Weekend 2010.  If it did not sell in auction I was going to lose the house. 

YUP, you guessed it….it did not sell.

Being that it was the holiday weekend I didn’t hear from anyone until the following Tuesday and at that point was told by my realtor (who felt awful I might add) to expect a call from the banks representative and to start packing. 

EXACTLY 10 days later I moved myself, my daughter and my 2 cats out of the one familiar place we had all shared.  In that time I had to: 

  • look at apartments 
  • qualify for an apartment
  • set up utilities
  • pack an ENTIRE HOUSE 
  • enlist friends to help me move
  • Try to explain to my daughter why we have to move even though no one bought the house
  • keep my emotional and mental sanity around my daughter

When I moved I didn’t have the chance to go through stuff like one would want and really distinguish what to keep and what to take.  I can tell you that I did 15 Goodwill runs with stuff that I knew I couldn’t / wouldn’t use again but SOOOO much was just boxed up and put into storage.

I am blessed, fortunate and forever grateful for my friend who owns an appliance shop who lets me store all my crap for free.  Tonight I decided after almost 2 years of being in my apartment to go sort through these boxes.

There is alot of my life in those boxes…some of it good, some of it sad…alot of fond memories.  I managed to get through one whole shelf tonight.

  • I gave my friends young daughter (in her 20’s) my full set of Noritake china…
  • I found 3 boxes of pictures (with negatives —yeah —I’m old) that I need to go through and pick out the ones that I want to keep
  • I made a donation box for Goodwill
  • I found and brought home cookbooks that I have missed
  • I boxed up 3 boxes of papers for shredding

Tonight was about cleansing…

About opening up a difficult and sad and seriously messed up part of my past and wading through it…We all have stuff like that to deal with…maybe not the loss of your house, but something that we need to revisit and purge in order to move on!

It was a hard hard thing to lose my home!  I prided myself on being that girl, that homeowner who never missed a payment and who was never late on a payment. 

But I look at where I am now…

  • Financially healthier…
  • Emotionally healthier…
  • Physically healthier…

…and I know that all in all, I am in a better place!  I don’t think that everything happens for a reason.  Sometimes I do think that we get screwed over and dicked with when we don’t deserve it.  But even when that happens to us {and it does happen to us all at one time or another} I have learned that I am strong enough to handle it and that through it…through the shit and the strife and the tears that

I WILL BECOME STRONGER ON THE OTHER SIDE!!

{if you read this all the way through — THANK YOU!! This post was really for me to remind me of where I had been and where I am now}

  

  1. runrunningrunner said: Wow that’s a tough one, and doesn’t it sometimes feel that when you’re down the hits keep on coming? Very glad though that you’ve come so far out the other side.
  2. rookcanrun said: As hard as that post was to read, I can only imagine how hard it was for you to write. I’m sorry you had to go through that. Way to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and doing life!!
  3. regainingmymoxy said: Being a grown up sucks. Perverse institutional logic sucks. Discovering how string we are, recovering from tough spots and finding you are in a better position. You are a better person for it. That is tge shut awesomesauce is made of.
  4. shrinkingwolf said: That’s horrible that they screwed you over like that :(
  5. lojogetsfaster said: Thank you for sharing that awesome story. Whatever doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. You seem pretty damn strong :)
  6. lifechangeneededaisle3 said: Amazing! You are a strong person! <3
  7. ironphenix said: I’m so proud of you.
  8. ashamedtosay said: I am sorry, that sucks and it sucks more that no one wins when that happens. Love you.
  9. auspiciousstruggle said: This economy has been bad for all. Me? Im 29, still at home because I couldnt get a job with my BA, went back to school for another degree and am in debt up to my eyeballs (well, school debt) because im not ‘qualified’ for anything. Its bs.
  10. footy-chic said: If you grow from an experience and become a better person, then it wasn’t a bad experience. Tough to go through it all though. Better for your daughter to see a strong mom who can survive it all!
  11. tallmormon said: amazing that you came out the other side. An amazing person because you did come out the other side still an amazing intact wonderful friend, mother and I am sure your sweetie thinks girlfriend.
  12. chrisrunsoldschool said: your one of the strongest people I know. I miss you. I am now keeping one K cup for making me cry. :)
  13. justdoitjolie said: I know exactly how you feel. My mom and dad had our house so go into foreclosure and it sold the day of my 23rd birthday. I can home to a note on the door that said we had 3 weeks to get out, its awful, but we live in a house we love now and we stuck together. god is good,…
  14. chrisbiketri said: You’re already stronger, just by hitting the enter key and will continue to be with each new box you open.
  15. runswithpoodle said: Ugh, I’m so sorry. It is a too-common story and I’m sorry you went through that, though happy you emerged happy and healthy. (Also, given the settlement this week, you may be in for some $$ — doesn’t make it okay, but could be a boost right now…)